Suddenly all that Daniel had observed of Mr. Threader rearranged, in his mind, into a novel, strange, but perfectly coherent picture; it was like watching a pile of rubble spontaneously assemble itself into a marble statue.
--Neal Stephenson, "The System of the World"
It was 100 outside, yesterday, at least according to my inside/outside thermometer; right now (at 5:30 am) it's 87, and the sun's not up yet. Inside it's a balmy 84. Various friends are taunting me with my recent declaration that I like hot weather. Generally speaking, I don't mind it as much as some people do, perhaps because I haven't had air conditioning in my home since about 1978 when I last lived with my parents. You just get used to it, more or less. I have to admit that working in a bakery isn't the way to go in this weather, though; it's just brutal. I also have to admit that I need the occasional foray into air-conditioned (or, at least, cooler) space.
I stopped by the YMCA today to make sure theyhad cancelled our membership--which affected me more than I would have predicted. I flashed back to when we joined, so Dave would have some place to take the Kid swimming and a place to work out himself. I didn't use it much, but didn't really expect to--I played handball elsewhere, and did yoga elsewhere, but I wanted Dave and the Kid to have a place to play, too. Since I couldn't tell you the last time Dave and the Kid went swimming, and since they haven't gone regularly (e.g., twice in a month) in well over a year, and since Dave is unemployed, it seemed foolish to continue paying for a membership. I may rejoin at the Y near the bakery (if I ever get around to actually playing handball there), but the point is that it felt like a tie was being cut.
Most of the time I just go along, doing what's in front of me, figuring out some medium-range and short-range things, blah, blah, blah, but every once in awhile I look up and wonder what the fuck happened. The quote above resonated with me when I read it last week, because anything like this requires some (re)evaluation, and I have plenty of time and space to do that. I still don't know exactly what happened or why, but at least I've been getting some insight on my end of it.